![]() ![]() When he was born, I would sing his name over and over to the tune of “Silent Night” as I rocked him to sleep. I haven’t told Ethan yet, but I plan to create a special playlist for him of my Christmas music. I play “Unstoppable” and feel like it was written for me. That part craves Miley Cyrus and Alicia Keys and Sia. I suppose I have always had a little rebel inside me. I listen to Fleetwood Mac or the Pretenders’ “I’ll Stand by You,” and I am back at the Delta Center at concerts Aaron took me to. I listen to Peter Gabriel or Sting and I remember falling in love with my husband. I listen to “The Man” and see her defiant, beautiful face. I’ve added Taylor Swift to my list because she reminds me so much of my daughter Ashley. Later, I added Diana Krall to that list and still get all gooey when I hear “Peel Me a Grape.” And now? I went through a female crooner period when only Sarah Vaughan or Billie Holladay would do. I remember the boy who dumped me in college who loved Bryan Adams, the nightclub I worked in where I used to play Madonna’s “Express Yourself,” and the way I would sing “Time for Me to Fly” or “Roll with the Changes” from REO Speedwagon whenever I needed courage. I’ve always thought I would love for Kurt to play “Summer Portrait” at my funeral. I so fondly revisited Kurt Bestor music from his “Seasons” album that I loved, and still love. Once I started adding songs to my playlist for Ethan, which I named Amanda Soundtrack, I found myself laughing and crying, remembering the period in my life when only Bob Seger could soothe me, the time when America’s “Sister Golden Hair” was my anthem. I included the Thompson Twins and Paul Simon, INXS and Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation.” I’m on a roll When I got a little older, I added Billy Joel’s “Scenes from an Italian Restaurant” and Michael Jackson’s everything. I started listening to Elton John then, too, “Funeral for a Friend” and “Levon.” When my parents sent me north to a school in New Hampshire, I started singing James Taylor’s “Carolina in My Mind” when I was homesick, only I’d change the word “Carolina” to “Pennsylvania.” I would belt out “Legend in Your Own Time” and “You’re so Vain” loud enough that neighbors would pound on the wall. I loved storytellers like Carly Simon, Joni Mitchell, James Taylor and Chicago. When I got to play my own records, my roommates would make gagging noises. The music did grow on me, and I find myself still craving a little “Back in Black” once in a while. I listened to Led Zepplin, Kansas, Journey, Aerosmith, Steve Miller and AC/DC whether I liked it or not. In the dorm where I lived in Florida when I was 12-15, I had roommates who were seriously into rock. I was 11 or 12 and singing “Blackbird” and “Norwegian Wood”. Suddenly I was in a swimming pool with 50 other kids, singing Beatles songs in my head while we swam endless laps. I opened Spotify and thought back to my earliest memories. Where to start with this Spotify playlist? ![]() “I’m not planning on ‘going’ any time soon,” I laughed. ![]()
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